Memorial Day 2013

What are we all doing on Memorial Day? I've been watching the Giants lose to the A's and reading a James Patterson novel. One of the characters was musing about his past and how after being injured in the British army and discharged, he had turned to the bottle trying to chase the demons away. How many of our homeless today are victims of PTSD or other disability and are not receiving appropriate treatment? I know this.....we have reduced the amount of money available for disabled veterans while we're sending gobs of money to other countries around the world. Why aren't we taking better care of our veterans?

Is it because we've become inured to war itself? I guess WWII was the last popular war in which our freedoms and our country itself were in danger. The Korean "police action" was not for our personal benefit, nor was Vietnam, nor was Bosnia. The first Gulf was perhaps not so much about oil, but to try to stabilize the Middle East. The invasion of Iraq was arguably based on faulty intelligence. Afghanistan was supposedly to capture/kill Osama, which after 9 years or so, we finally did. We don't even seem to publically protest the recent wars as was done during Vietnam.

It is impossible for me to feel the same emotions of those who have been in boots on the ground combat. I saw plenty of the havoc of war during my Navy service during Korea, but not the kind that our troops have seeing in the jungles and in the desert. Not the kind of death and destruction that comes from such things as IED's.

I think what I'm feeling right now is a mixture of anger and sorrow, anger at war itself, and deep, deep sorrow for those who have died (needlessly ?) . Should we celebrate today as we do Independence Day, or should we be thanking God for those who have served and praying for their safety.

This is one of the last times I saw my #1 (first born) grandson alive. Matthew Lee (12/24/1984-7/31/2011. Matthew had attended Grossmont College in San Diego, choosing it among other reasons for it's reputation for it's baseball program.

Matt was a good baseball player throughout high school and had high hopes for a baseball career; however, he suffered a shoulder injury which prevented him from even being scouted. Nonetheless, he continued his education and was to enter Sacramento State for his senior year in September, 2011.

One of the few things I've had problems dealing with is my anger over how Matt died. He and his two brothers have had both peanut and tree nut allergies their entire lives and everyone knew it. Even so, he was served a salad containing some kind of nut oil, and immediately went into  analphylactic shock, a completely unnecessary death in the beginning of adulthood with a great life and career to look forward to. Matt had professed belief and trust in Jesus some years previously and so it is with hope that he and I will be reunited some day. 

Matt's funeral was attended by at least 200 persons, many of which were friends of his in high school, but also many came up from San Diego who had worked with him at Target. Matt was loved by everyone who knew him. 

Miss you #1, and always will.

Rather than going into the gory details of my hip injury now, (that means it will come later), I'll just say that I have come a long way physically from where I was 2 years ago. Although I still have pain and stiffness, it is so incredibly better than it was. I can walk but I need a cane if it's for some distance, I can do my "man chores" around the house and yard. I have stopped doing rehab type exercises, but just go about my life in as normal a way as possible. I have reached what I call the "new normal", and I'm grateful that I've come that far. If I continue to get mobility, that's just that much more to be thankful for.

Persons who know me well constantly comment on how cheerful I always seem to be. One of my pastors whom I regard as the ultimate pastor and who I respect more than any other man I've known, wrote me a note stating that I'd "been an inspiration" to him. I didn't know quite what to make of that, but my closest family assured me that it was because I wasn't pissin' and moanin' about my situation and blaming God and all that stuff. This from a man had had been and continues to be an inspiration to me. So there you are.

Does everyone have a "bucket list'"?  I sure did. It was to see the SF Giants win a World Series before I left this earth. I not only was able to scratch it off the list in November 2010, but did it again in November 2012. It's no longer on my bucket list, but I sure do hope they get another ring. After all, the 49ers have 5, and almost had a 6th one this past season.

How interesting that I came across this old endeavor of mine 4 years to the day  since my last post.. So much has happened in my life since then, so much that I feel compelled to write about them so that I can remember and revisualize both the good and the bad. The reader might wonder why I might want to remember the bad happenings, but as I think about them I also remember that Almighty God was in control, He knew my pain, and He helped me to cope with the negative and turn them into the positive. He comforted me, He healed me, He was always there to talk to me, and He blessed me throughout the entire 4 years.

The most memorable negative occurrences went from prostate cancer, a "mini" stroke, the loss of my beloved grandson, a broken hip, to a life threatening infection. There were new friends gained and old friends lost, relationships enriched, relationships weakened, financial resources gained, and financial resources VVVV, but again through all, I remembered that as God's child, He would never leave me or desert me.

More tomorrow, if I can see this in print and still want to do it. LOL